LIFE | FOLLOW UP TO A YEAR OF SELF CARE
In the last year, a common theme in my everyday conversations was the impact Covid had on everyone’s mental well being; even the strongest people I knew hadn’t escaped and in fact many of us have been internally reflecting on what’s important in our life.
Last February, I wrote down my reflective thoughts on life. In hindsight, I prehaps hadn’t realised that covid had also weaved itself into my own mental health and noting my self-care tips was a great way to actual give my mind some well deserved attention, away from the chaotic life juggling. Now with it being just over a year, my mind feels in a great place and my self care routine definitely played a part. Here’s a rundown of what I’ve learnt….
Journal
With a full-time job and motherhood juggling, I didn’t have as much time to journal as I would like and there are still half a dozen draft posts to finish. However, when I did find the time, writing offered much needed escapism particularly as travelling had been limited. My mind was transported back to trips to India and Mexico, and I dived into photo albums relishing in the lovely memories.
Many of us may not think we have a creative bone in our body, and I too was a doubter but in fact I believe we all have a creative strand that may be sitting there waiting to be tapped into.
2. Gratitude
I’m not one for writing my daily gratitude list but on a bad day or week, I’ll take a note of good things that have happened and it can be simple as having a lovely conversation with a mum at the school gates or being with my girls reading a bedtime story. It really helps focus your mind on all the positives in your life pushing any negativity to the side.
On an unrelated tanget, life has been challenging, managing work alongside navigating our twins’ endless tantrums as well as understanding their personalities/worries but noting the progress we’ve made from children who wouldn’t put on clothes or walk a few metres without a meltdown to running to nursery (fully dressed) made me realise that all challenges are temporary and we get there in the end. However sometimes we need to hit rock bottom to discover the cause and find a solution.
A lot of us have life goals and at the end of each year, I like to note down the things that I’ve accomplished - we can often forget how far we’ve come and I encourage everyone to do this so you can see the progress you’re making in life. Not only does it help cement your achievements but it makes you realise that you have so much to be grateful for.
3. Affirmations
I’m not a daily affirmation person, simply because I don’t have the time but one affirmation that I do like is to ‘trust and let go’. Whenever a wave of anxiety crops up or a negative thought enters my mind, I silently repeat this affirmation a few times, deep breathe and the anxiety melts away.
4. Personal-growth
I like to do things that terrify me, that push me out of my comfort zone and public speaking is one of these. I rejoined my local Toastmasters, a global public speaking community and my confidence has soared.
Not only have I enjoyed being back on the stage but having time to write speeches on topics that interest me took me on my own personal journey and I’ve reaped the rewards at work and in my personal life, feeling equipped to take on any challenge thrown my way. Toastmasters will forever be in my life with one of my goals to complete my Toastmaster pathway and to be a confident public speaker.
5. Investing in my personal health
Just as I rejoined my local gym, I became pregnant so for investing in my personal health was put on the back-burner. This will be this year’s goal post baby with plenty of mummy exercise classes to join. However, I’ve made sure to take walks as often as possible and living close to the Thames allowed me to get back to nature and relish the benefits of tree therapy. It really is a thing!
I also said I would focus on my mental health with prehaps trying meditation. This also hasn’t been the case but given I’ve suffered from many of a sleepless night over the past year, often being awake for hours with a racing mind, my mind could definitely benefit from some solid meditation.
6. Stop planning
Now this one was a hard one as our brains have become auto-piloted to control every aspect of our lives. I said I would steer clear of Rightmove which wasn’t quite the case. Space, fresh air, a garden and a new chapter were calling (particularly with another one on the way) so we put our house on the market, and started the search for a new area to build the next stage of our family.
I remember being overwhelmed talking to one of my friends as to how we would get everything figured out in a short amount of time but she said life has a way of falling nicely into place. We found a beautiful house, another renovation project in an area we love along with a school. It may be realised to live by my favourite mantra of trusting and letting go, we can plan to our heart’s content but life has a funny way of working out.
In other aspects, we let life take its flow and I stopped planning holidays and weekend excursions. A trip to Malta and Florida had not been on our radar but our Malta trip came at the perfect time, and strolling Valetta’s streets, absorbing its beautiful architecture, eating amazing food and seeing my kids so happy was the perfect antitidote to the two years of lockdown.
We escaped London when we could; day trips to Windsor Great Park, Marlow, Savill Gardens, Windsor itself created amazing life memories and I still scroll my photo reel enjoying my children’s smiles and watching them enjoy new pastures. I relished in the simple things; watching them conquer bike riding, jumping on a bouncy castle, riding carousels at Kew Gardens, stroking a horse for the first time, throwing pebbles on the beaches in Lymington and watching donkeys come by the house.
7. Reading
With no distracting social media, I got back to bedtime reading and devoured An American Marriage, American Dirt and The Girl with the Louding Voice - all incredible books which are worth a read.
With the urge just to scroll TikTok and Instagram at bedtime has meant the benefits of reading including switching off your mind, learning about other cultures, being transported to another world and even improving sleep has been neglected. Even with the impending sleepless nights to contend with, I’ll still try to read a few pages.
